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14 Types of People You Find at Nigerian Wedding Parties

In yet another interesting article, a Nigerian blogger and writer has revealed the different sets of people you’d encounter at a typical Nigerian wedding.
File photo: DJ Xclusive’s traditional marriage in Lagos
Saturdays have become synonymous with weddings. It is day when the groom and bride make their vows to become one and cherish each other forever. The whole ambience: the colours, the food, the MC, the brides family, the groom family, friends, relations etc add to the success of the day.
Some blogs even rub it on the faces of single people with fairy tale weddings that they publish. Just as someone pointed out, we would never run out of Saturdays so no need to fret another person’s wedding.
That being said, Nigerian weddings can be filled with dramas behind the scenes. Well, there are some regular people you will find at almost every wedding ceremony, here is my list:
The Brother/sister of the bride (groom)
This person is overly busy. He or she is just everywhere coordinating, arranging, running errands, serving food, organising. In short they are everywhere. All guests admire his/ her efforts and see him/her as too efficient. The award for the hard worker goes to them.
 
The Glutton
This set of people forgot to eat from home so they start hustling to be served food. They forgot their manners and allow hunger to remove their dignity. For this people, their motto is me first before others. When served, they satisfy themselves before thinking of other people at the table.
The Bitter Aunty
This woman assumes that every single lady present is an enemy of progress. You can’t dance with the couple because she forms an unnecessary banner over the couple. She has an issue with the fact that you are single.
The Clique
They appear to be advantageous. They bought asoebi. They get the best of seats. They get served food on time. They receive the best souvenirs. The wedding reception was for them oo. You can’t join them because they will make you feel like an outcast.
The Mogbomoyas (a.k.a where the party @)
They are thankful that  the wedding didn’t need an IV to make an entrance.These people gate crash and pretend like they were invited when we know they don’t know anybody at the wedding ceremony. They blend in easily.
The Selfie freak
This person attended the wedding to be snapping pictures to post on social media. He/She wants to show that he or she is the owambe guy/chic. I don’t envy such people from beginning to the end of the event; it is selfies all the way. Don’t mind me; they are having fun, abi?
The Networkers
They are on a business mission in a wedding ceremony. As they meet with people they are dropping their business cards advertising their make up business, fashion line, small chops business, photography hustle, souvenirs jobs etc. They do not slack as they want to make money on the go anywhere, anyhow.
 
The Single but seriously searching
These  people came to the wedding for a mission to hook up. While the whole ceremony is going on, they are busy trying mingling and possibly hooking up. Their phones are ever ready to collect contacts and do necessary follow-ups.
 
The Single and so what?
Don’t ask this people when they are getting married because you would not get any answer. They would reply with smiles and shove you off. These people have a motto:’You Only Live Once’ – so they try to live their life to the fullest despite their marital status. At wedding ceremonies, they are the ones that seem to dance the most. At times, someone needs to remind them that they should not over dance lest people think they are the couple celebrating.
 
The Married
Every wedding is a reminder of how they started out and did theirs. They seem to compare their own big day to the one they are attending presently-what went well or what did not go well? They are always dressed in the same attires as per couple things. People tend to compliment them on how they look better off now that they are married.
 
The Children
Care-free as they are, they liven up weddings. They also have their roles to play in weddings whether in the bridal train or not. Children have nothing to worry about compared to adults who think of bills, relationships, education, contracts, jobs, investment….you know now? We all need cute children around… Don’t we?
 
The Old School
They frown when the DJ starts spinning new school music. They do not need to utter words but their facial expressions speak volumes. When the music changes to oldies you see them coming alive and beaming with smiles as they remember the good old days.
 
The New School
They do not really like live bands. They prefer the DJ playing latest jamz. They know the latest dance and their names. They can form a good choreography team for the couple.
 
The Ride or Die chic
She is a complete slayer. With the latest amoeba style, infinite gele and make up on point. She tends to draw attraction. Sometimes, she need to be reminded that the wedding is not about her and she should not compete with the bride.

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“Couples who sleep naked have a happier relationship” – Survey

A new survey has revealed that couples who sleep naked have a happier relationship.

The study from Cotton USA asked couples what they slept in at bedtime and then asked them to rate how happy they were in their relationship.

According to the results, 57 percent of those who slept in the nude said they felt happy, compared to 48 percent of pyjamas wearers, 43 percent of nightie wearers and a mere 38 percent of people who wore pants, bum shorts, etc.

Stephanie Thiers-Ratcliffe of Cotton USA said that one of the leading factors for this was that the nakedness encouraged intimacy and openness, thanks to the skin-on-skin contact and the feeling of soft bedding.

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Guys! Ths is what happens to the pen*s as you get older, according to science

Our bodies change with age, but how about the most private parts? What happens to Pen.!s when it ages? Let’s get some clear answers.

So, guys, what can you expect to happen to your Pen.!s when you grow older? These clues will prepare you for the inevitable changes.

How Pen.!s changes with age?

Length

When most men are born, their Pen.!ses reach only 4 cm in length! The average size ranges between 16 and 23 cm. Does it decrease in size, when you grow old? Not exactly, but things change. For instance, if you gain much weight, your Pen.!s looks shorter. The fat is located in the lower part of your belly and covers up part of the Pen.!s shaft. However, in your 60s or 70s the Pen.!s can actually a bit shrink in size by some 2-3 cm.

Testicle size

After 40 they decrease by 1 third of their size. Healthy younger men have them around 3 cm in size, while the older guys may have only 2 cm size balls.

Working condition

The performance changes, too. When you turn 40, your S3@.x:’ual activity and the amount of male hormones in the body decreases. In the youth a healthy man may have S3@.x:’ several times a day, in the later age erectile dysfunction may change things for worse. The muscles weaken and the vessels get clogged. It also contributes to weaker erection. So, having S3@.x:’ few times a week is great, when you age.

man

Enjoyment

It greatly depends on the sensitivity of your male organ. Unfortunately with age it decreases a bit, but it’s good for those guys, who come too fast. Now they have more chances to gain control and boost the duration of their performance in bed.

Looks

You start losing your head hair with the age, but that’s not it. Men also lose their pubic hair and their Pen.!ses change the color a bit.

Time spares no one, so enjoy your S3@.x:’ life in the  young age, but do not worry, over 80 percent of men maintain their male organs in great working condition even being seniors.

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Guys beware! It is dangerous to have s*x in these 4 situations

Is S3@.x:’ always good? There are times when you should stay away from it, and every man should know the reasons not to get busy! This list may surprise you.

List of 4 reasons why not to have S3@.x:’:

Besides the obvious thing – not being the husband of the lady you plan to enjoy, there are other reasons to keep away from intimacy. Here they are.

1. At your bachelor’s party

party

You are a groom and your friends bring in some girls to have fun at your last bachelor’s night out. It’s the worst possible idea to get busy with a stripper or some strange girl. You have picked that woman to be your wife for a reason. Keep it in mind, when other ladies offer fun to you. You do not want to start your married life with cheating. What you sow, you will reap!

2. Alcohol

alcohol

Either you or she or both of you are drunk. How much is too much? 3 to 5 drinks can make you less wise in your decisions and less cautious. Consuming alcohol, you become more open for risky things, such as unprotected S3@.x:’. And you put yourself and the other person in danger of getting SDTs (HIV and other love bugs) or impregnating the woman.

Such a situation is highly undesirable. So, if you drink too much, make a rule to abstain from S3@.x:’ with a new girlfriend.

3. At her parents’ house

house

That’s not the best location for the love games. They may return home unexpectedly. Or if they are home, they may enter her room any time and catch you at it. It’s a very embarrassing situation.

4. When you wish to marry her

marry

She is a V!rg!n, and you have made up your mind to marry her. But you want her so and think: what if we do it now? Why wait for the wedding night? Stop! You are going to ruin it all. Waiting does not kill anyone. Just set the date and you won’t regret it. As waiting double the pleasure on the first night!

These reasons should stop you and make you think. S3@.x:’ is not always a good idea, and it can be dangerous and has the power to ruin your life when done at the wrong time and with the wrong person.

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